Course & Race Information

*The criterium course took place on the tarmac of the Waynesburg Airport in Green County, PA, mere eyeshot from our EconoLodge housing Friday night. The wing-shaped -mile course was flat, wide, and fast with two sharp turns on either end. The sprint to the finish line after the final turn was approximately 200m. The course was shortened after the Men's D race, which circled the full 1-mile perimeter of the runway, but Hopkins was too good to enter D riders.

Race Details & Highlights
In the Men's C race, Pete stayed near the front of the pack for the duration of the race, pulling hard for the team. Though he finished 23rd overall, his efforts during have not been overlooked. Jake did his part for Hopkins by taking 4th on the first prime lap and subsequently executing a brilliant plan of crashing four cyclists out of the race (1 App State casualty). He finished 11th. On the second prime lap, Navy and App State riders leading the sprint forgot to look to their left, allowing John to squeeze a sneak attack past on the inside lane to easily take the prime. John finished 22nd overall. Eric endured chain-dropping trouble, attributed to badgering idiots who worked on his bike, which hampered an attempted prime sprint. Fortunately, he was able to overcome his mechanical malfunction to finish 21st in the race. James led the Hopkins men in the C category, finishing with a monster sprint that landed him 7th place overall. Steve, sticking with the pack, finished just behind three of his teammates, taking 25th place.

Smitty was the solo Hopkins flyer in the Men's B race. He stuck close in the front pack of the racers for the entire race, and at one time pulled the entire field, much to Cliff's verbal disapproval. Jonathan finished strong in the pack on the final sprint, claiming 18th place overall.

The Men's A race was fast and furious. The field of 31 was so dangerously eager to race that race organizers had to delay their start in order to cool them off the only way they knew how: by landing a helicopter on the race course. Nathan stayed at the very front of the pack for most of the race and took advantage of great opportunities to sprint for 4th in the first and second primes and 3rd in the fifth prime. He took 7th place overall in a violent final sprint that had the potential to kill many spectators (most of them App State). Ryan stuck in the middle of the field for most of the race but made moves up to the front on several laps. He finished closely behind Nathan in 12th place. Though he rode very strongly with the A field, Cliff eventually dropped off the back towards the end of the race. He finished the course solo and landed 28th place overall.

In Women's B, Allie alone represented Hopkins and stayed with the field for much of the race. Though she was lagging behind the other lady cyclists at one point, Allie recovered, caught back up to the field and finished 11th out of 13 competitors.

The Women's A race was hard-fought and perhaps the most fun and unpredictable to watch in the day. Katie, Laura, and Susanna shifted positions multiple times during the course of the race, moving from the front to the back and back to the front every couple laps. Susanna stayed up front and pulled the field for much of the race and led a strong final lap sprint. Unfortunately, she could not keep it up to the very end and fell back, finishing 11th. Laura stayed in the thick of the field and was seen moving up towards the front on the final laps of the race. She finished a strong 7th overall. Katie fell towards the back of the field half way through the race but managed to stick with the other riders, finishing in 12th place.

Summary
Johns Hopkins > Appalachian State

STATISTICS:

Criterium Results
Men's C, field of 38: James (7th), Jake (11th, 4th Prime 1), Eric (21st), John (22nd, 1st Prime 2), Pete (23rd), Steve (25th)
Men's B, field of 37: Smitty (18th)
Men's A, field of 31: Nathan (7th, 4th Prime 1, 4th Prime 2, 3rd Prime 5), Ryan (12th), Cliff (28th)
Women's B, field of 13: Allie (11th)
Women's A, field of 12: Laura (7th), Susanna (11th), Katie (12th)

Miscellaneous
People knocked out, wrecked, paralyzed by Jake: 4 (no motorcycles)
Gunshots heard: 0, turns out it was Steve's spare wheel
App State bicycles TPed Friday night: 24
App State riders able to ID TP culprits....maybe 1
Helicopter: 1
VT socks sold: ∞

Fun on a scale of 1 to 10:
1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10

Team Time Trial:

The course was the same one as last year, starting at the abandoned schoolhouse in Waynesburg, PA. The first climb is a doozey and hits you within the first mile. Once you get over that mile-long monster, you get a nice descent with some rollers into the lovely little town of Morrisville, PA, where we had parked our cars during spring break. After a few very tight turns and a bridge, you're off again on the rollers where we trained. It's a difficult undulating backcountry road until finally you turn onto the narrow street alongside the cow farm and begin the final climb. It's a bit steeper than the first but not quite as long. The descent comes quickly and sharply thereafter and ends with a tight turn under a bridge and a ninety degree turn onto the final stretch. It's mostly flat from there with a little upturn right at the finish line.

Highlights:
After a tiring criterium in the morning, we all got our race-weary legs on our trainers in our own personal parking lot nearer to the finish than to the start line. It was a tough day, but we showed some real fighting spirit out there.

Men's C: After realizing that Jake's bike frame was ready to fall apart at any moment, the C's team contemplated forgoing this race for the safety's sake. But in the end the competitive drive and Jake's insatiable love of aero bars were enough to get the team out there, warmed up or not.

Jake, Steve and John went out there with fervor, but the team's legs quickly filled with lactic acid. John led strong up the first climb, but unfortunately Steve and Jake don't have legs the size of tree trunks. Still, the team persevered through the pain and finished in a very respectable 40:37 to land a 4th place finish.

Men's B: Smitty and Bolster might have been giving James an earful, but he claimed he was thankful for the motivation. Unfortunately, it wasn't quite enough to keep his eyes on the road. James nearly lost his nipple when he wiped out, but the trooper got back up and finished the race. In spite of the little fall and the tired bodies, the Men's B's finished in under 40 minutes at 39:43.

Women's A: Allie knew it wasn't going to be easy sticking with the A's when she catted up, but she had no idea just how much they'd pound it right from the start. Susanna, Laura and Katie went out strong and by the first climb it was apparent they were feeling good. Good enough to beat the entire field, in fact, coming in 1st with a time of 41:32.

Men's A: Cliff, Bloomer and Nathan were preparing for nationals with this little warm-up exercise. They looked really sweet in their TT helmets and disc wheels and came in an impressive 36:11 for 5th place.

RESULTS
Men's C: 40:37 (4th place)
Men's B: 39:43 (9th place)
Men's A: 36:11 (5th place)
Women's A: 41:32 (1st place)

JHU, Pre-race Pranksters:
After a long day of criterium-ing and team time trialing on Saturday, the team was ready to relax on Saturday night in preparation for a grueling road race on Sunday. However, the Hopkins Cycling Team doesn't rest until justice has been served! A select group of pranksters decided Appalachian State needed to learn an important lesson. That lesson: don't win conferences or YOU GET TOILET PAPER ALL OVER YOUR BIKES!!!! However, we got a little too excited and decided to spread toilet tissue all over everyone's cars and bikes, even our own. Ap State retaliated on Sunday morning by sending a confused rider to our hotel room...he couldn't find his own. American U retaliated by unsuccessfully hitting on a waitress in the hotel restaurant.

Racing

The Course:
While everybody enjoys an occasional prank, the real reason we were at the Wisp ski resort this Sunday, April 22nd was to race our bicycles on an epic conference championship road course. The course was approximately 25 miles long. It began with a neutral roll-out of approximately 2 miles. Once the race began, it was less than a mile to the first climb, where many riders fell victim to dropped chains and useless legs. The course rose to elevations that can only be described as ludicrous. Just when you thought it was impossible to climb any higher, each twist and turn of the road seemed to reveal more and more climbing. The majority of the circuit was undulating with some extremely steep uphills and downhills. There weren't many dangerous S-curves, but the few we encountered were quite dangerous. The final 2km of the course consisted of a steep uphill that leveled off to a slight climb for the final km all the way to the finish line.

Men's C:
Men's Cs were first on the road. During the neutral roll-out the usual sketchy C's bike handling skills were apparent. As soon as the group hit the first climb less than a mile into the race, the group began to spread apart immediately as a Wake Forest rider accelerated violently to a solo breakaway that would eventually be the winning move of the 25 mile race. Jake, James, John, and Crazy Old Man Bolster rode with the lead group for the first 15 miles of the race at which point they split into various groups. Steve and Eric Gou found a few other riders at the back to work with. That group of 5 riders worked together to pull in other riders that continually dropped from the pack as they hit climb after climb. Jake decided to join the chase group and Steve was simultaneously dropped. Jake and Gou worked together with some other riders, reeling in the weary 1 by 1. They finished 19th and 20th respectively. James was right up there with the front group when he was forced to walk back to the neutral cars when he literally ripped his chain in half with an acceleration reminiscent of Lance Armstrong's move on Alpe D'huez in the 2001 tour. Crazy Old Man Bolster the Pirate used his snarl and his unusually strong peg-leg to finish an incredible 7th place. John also stuck with the front group for most of the race until he dropped his chain. After fixing the mechanical, John hopped into a 5 man paceline and proceeded to chase the lead group. A few miles later, John was leading the paceline when he noticed an obstruction in the road ahead. He yelled, "dog in the road!!! No, wait, KID ON BIKE! THERE IS A KID ON HIS BIKE IN THE ROAD!!!." John lead the paceline gently to the right side of the road to pass the kid on his bike. As they neared this kid, John commanded the kid to not move. John yelled, "STAY RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE!!! DO NOT MOVE!!!" The kid on his bike looked over his shoulder and became very startled and frightened by the image of 5 spandex-clad bikers lead out by none other than John Lian. So, naturally, the kid lets out some yelping noises and various profanities followed by the decision to move to the right, completely blocking John's path. The group of 5 riders scattered across the road at the last second to narrowly avoid destroying thousands of dollars of carbon fiber and titanium. In the end, John also scared off most of the other riders with his Jan Ullrich-esque quadriceps to zoom across the line in 12th place. Steve worked at the back of the race with a few other riders and managed to roll across the line in 30th place of 39 riders.

Women's B:
Women's Bs started just after the Men's Cs pack. The women started out together but the field completely shattered on the first climb. Some of the girls formed a group of 4 riders at the back of the field and worked together for the majority of the race. Allie decided to brave the elements alone. She rocketed up and down the mountains of West Virginia to land herself a 7th place finish along with 21 points.

Men's A, Women's A Men's B:
Next to start was the Men's As group. Nathan, Bloomer, and Cliff lined up with a pack of riders who looked decidedly fit and ready to ride. Good thing they've been working out so much, they were in for a 75+ mile sufferfest; a full 3 laps of the brutal course...an epic ride by anyone's account. Men's Bs and Women's As started shortly after Men's As. Katie and Susanna started out strong. However, Katie fell victim to mechanical problems. Susanna stuck with the group and finished 7th place, raking in 40 points. Smitty started all alone in Men's Bs and punished the field for a few miles before deciding that his kit was way too clean. He made the executive decision to hop off his bike mid-turn and roll around in the dirt to fix the problem. Meanwhile, Gou, John and Steve attempted toÊfix Katie's bike while the rest of the team headed to the feed zone to make sure that the As riders could get nutritious replenishment during their ride. By the time we got to the feed zone, we didn't have to wait long. Nathan came into view first, working with two other riders at the very front! The riders made this excruciating climb look like a tiny hill, gracefully stomping to the top at speeds around 15 miles per hour (for a comparison, I was going 10...maybe). By this point, about halfway into the race, Nathan's group of 3 was followed closely by 2 more riders. After that, there was a considerable gap back to the other riders in the As field who hadn't yet been pulled from the race. We found out later that Bloomer incurred a mysterious flat tire on the first climb. He was forced to root through the pile of wheels in the wheel truck to find a replacement, and by the time he got back on the road, he had lost atleast 3 or 4 minutes and was isolated from all of the other riders. Cliff rolled past the feed zone a few minutes back from Nathan with some other As riders. Somehow he managed to yell at James as he passed, "Coke, Where's Bloomer?, COOMMEEE ON!!!" The next time the field passed the feed zone on the final lap, Nathan was still leading a 3 man group, riding at a punishing pace with what can only be described as an impressivelyÊcalm and collected demeanor. After deciding that Jake wasn't going home early, we drove to the finish line. Just before the final climb, Nathan turned to the other riders in his group, and in true Lance Armstrong fashion, he inquired, "You guys ready for some fun?" He subsequently mashed on his pedals and danced up the final climb, followed only by McFeely of Navy. The riders crested the final hill with McFeely just in front of Nathan. McFeely gave Nathan a lead-out all the way up the final straight, but proved to be just a bit stronger, as Nathan finished an unbelievable and epic 2nd place just 2 bike lengths behind. Absolutely incredible! This was without a doubt the greatest finish I have ever seen. Cliff finished 26th place edging out a number of riders who undoubtedly had fatter legs and smaller bikes.

Read on for shenanigans:

We returned to our cars after the races to find that Ap State had struck again...they packed our car for us?!? What? Anyway, Cliff, Allie, and Steve piled into Jake's car to start the trip back to Baltimore. About 20 minutes into the ride, I noticed a giant mutant crazed rampaging wasp on the inside of my passenger side window. Jake screamed "Get it out! Kill it!" and simultaneously rolled down the window. It was presumed that the wasp flew out, but I was skeptical. We stopped at Burger King a few minutes later and grabbed some really high qual. food which we brought into the car with us. About 10 minutes later, I looked at Jake's leg and noticed the mutant wasp had returned. This time...it was after Jake's food. I yelled and Jake again instructed me to kill it. I swung at it frantically with my stack of neuroscience papers while shrieking like a little girl on Christmas morning. Jake swerved violently across the highway narrowly avoiding the guardrail only to find that a tractor trailer was pulling into our lane. Jake was in a pickle, and he reacted on instinct. He fed gas while simultaneously shifting into reverse and pulling on the hand brake. The Lexus RX300 with a fresh 4 quarts of oil purred as it spun a full 720 degrees behind the tractor trailer and gracefully into a lane of oncoming traffic. Jake reversed the spin and slid across the pavement to place the car neatly back into our lane. Cliff and Allie remained calm as my heart stopped for a full 45 seconds. One problem remained, the wasp was inside Jake's Burger King bag. Still in a frenzy, I grabbed the entire bag and launched it out of our passenger side window, not realizing that it still contained most of Jake's food. " Dude, why'd you throw my burger out the window?!" Jake exclaimed in an inquisitive manner. Just when we thought we were out of trouble, Billy-bob the pick-up truck driver pulled up to our driver side and mouthed "@$#^$@$^%$#!!$#$#@!#!@" I guess the moral of the story is...there's a reason all horror movies take place in West Virginia (reference: Wrong Turn).

Results:
Men's A (75 miles):
Nathan Coleman - 2nd place
Cliff Smoot - 26th place
Ryan Bloom(er) - 30th place (flat tire)

Women's A (50 miles):
Susanna Matsen - 7th place
Katie Ross - dnf (no chain)

Men's B (50 miles):
Jon Smits - 33rd

Women's B (25 miles):
Allie Wilson - 7th place

Men's C (25 miles):
Pete Bolster - 7th place
John Lian - 12th place
Jacob Koenig - 19th place
Eric Gou - 20th place
Steve Kornweiss - 30th place
James Robbins - dnf (ripped his chain in half)